The Promise Can This Be Real

 

Broken image

Can this be real..how can my king be gone just ripped out of my life..I leave the hospital a day later with just minor bruises..but I feel like I am dreaming but it’s a nightmare..I have to leave with out my king..my lover..my friend..He is no longer with me..Can this be real..

Guilt 

My mom and dad drive me to the house.. no longer my dream house because my king is gone..I think why didn’t I cook he would still be here..but no I insisted that we go out..oh my God what have done to my king.. I managed to make it upstairs to our bed..all I can do is cry..I take his shirt out the closet and I lay on the bed with it close to me smelling his scent..I can’t focus I just want my king back alive..My mom knocks on the door and comes in.. she sat beside me and say baby we got to start making arrangements..all I can do is cry..I can’t bury my king because then it will be real..and I will know he’s not coming back..She said the funeral director is done stair..I gather myself together and we go down stairs..I hear him talking but I can hear him..I say mom I can’t do this.. I can’t bury my king..why did I this happen to us ..Can this be real..I hear my parents and his parents talking but it sound like gibberish..they’re making arrangements to bury my king..I look at my mom and I say how could God let this happen to us.. we are saved, we belong to Him so why did he take my king from me.. I can’t live without him..Oh God please give him back to me..I pass out because when I awake I am in bed with his mother beside me.. She like hear baby you gotta eat but I just look at the food and tell her.. I can’t.. I just want to sleep..

Good-Bye

I feel my  life has end..as the limo approaches the house..and people began to go to there cars..My parents ride with me in limo..as we approach the church I wanna scream I can’t do this..they lead us in my mom on one side of me and my dad the other side.. I see my King laying there and I’m frozen..thinking how we met at church and became friends..how our relationship grow and how for two long years we waited for each other..the walks we would take, hiking , picnics, dinners and dancing..quiet evening at home..now I’m standing here kissing my King for the last time..Can this be real..My King is really gonna after the funeral, and all the people say there I’m sorry and good bye.. l am exhausted..my mom insisted on saying a couple of weeks with me.. I’m to drained to fight her so I say okay..

Can this be real

I undress and slip into his pajama shirt..I slide under the covers and I cry .. I ask God why .. I ask God to give me strength to make it .. I ask God how can I go on without the love of my King..I said God we stood before You and declared our love and then three years later you take him from me..God what about all the dreams we had of a family, of all the things we were going to do and places to see..God why did you take my King..why not take us together.. exhausted I cry out God forgive me..I know Father that You’re thoughts are higher than mine..I know you are a God of love but my heart is breaking without my King..  Can this be real..I wake up looking  around my King is saying baby wake up..please wake up.. I open my eyes and I see my King and I look around at the room and all the machines..and my King said I never gave up hope that God would give you back to me..I said but my King said don’t talk baby just rest..CAN THIS BE REAL..My King and I..

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