I am one tired momma.. I have no one to really talk to about how I feel about my daughter surgery.. I mean I have my family but I’m the oldest of five.. so I’m supposed to be the strong one and I don’t want to always burden them with my problems.. so instead I will bring them to the blogosphere.. my daughter wants all my focus on her and she should.. it’s only right because she is the one having surgery.. and she is the youngest of three and the girl I always wanted.. but we had given up on having one.. but God saw fit to give my husband and I a beautiful chocolate angel from heaven.. and we spoiled her rotten and it shows.. as a good parent should we always want the best for our children.. and we hate to see them suffer.. and no matter what is going on with us.. we have to be strong and present for them..
I see it with my oldest grandson.. he is six and his two younger brothers who are one year old and six months.. so he went from having all the attention for five years to being the oldest.. and I know it’s hard for him.. sometimes without knowing it the oldest gets neglected.. they say the middle child doesn’t get enough attention but I believe it’s the oldest.. so the other day I just let him express his self and get his feelings out.. so I decided once a week we are going to talk.. so if it’s anything he needs to say or express he can.. I see him almost everyday but after our heart to heart.. I realized a lot has changed in short period of time for him..
As you can see I live for my kids.. well not just my kids but all kids.. but I was supposed to be talking about me.. but I guess I just need to suck it up and deal with the pain.. because today it’s kicking my butt.. the weather is changing here.. a cold front is moving in.. and I never thought the cold would increase my pain but it has.. but what can I do.. still no pain meds.. so I will continue to suffer in silent for the moment..
I’m gonna end by saying.. I am glad I found this place called blogosphere or blogging.. I can focus on me.. and right now this has to be my way of getting my feelings out as I can no longer afford therapy for the moment.. but anyway like the say on The Middle “whatcha gonna do”..
“as always be blessed “