Why

I knew he would come but why did I open the door.. I knew he would come but why did I listen to what he had to say..

I had hope with all my heart that it would be the words I long hear.. I love you and miss you that his life is not complete without me in it..

I knew he would come because I felt it all that day.. I knew he wouldn’t give up control over me that easily.. I knew it had only been a couple of months since I blocked him and had no communication whatsoever with him.. so why did I answer the door..

When I prayed for God to free me from him.. and God being God did just what I prayed for Him to do.. So I can no longer pretend that I’m weak to his lies or even the way he says my name.. I’m no longer a victim to his words of abuse.. of being lower than I am in orders to make him feel better about his self.. yes I am surprised at only two months in or away from him.. I feel better about me..

I listen to how nothing had changed yet he said he missed me.. but yet things would return to the same.. I was told that I would forever be his b****..  How could I go back to that when I know who God created me to be..

So why did I open the door.. I guess hoping he had changed.. hoping just maybe he loved me.. but I know that will never be the case.. I know that God has set me free from him.. and the feelings I feel for him grow weak everyday..

So why did I open the door to truly lock it on something that will never be..

The Original Me Ann

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2 thoughts on “Why

  1. Because you’re human Ann and although we know with our mind, we can feel different in our emotions. Just keep up that wall, a small breach once in awhile may actually help your resolve. Hope springs eternal even when misplaced. Take Care.
    ~~dru~~

    Liked by 1 person

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