In My Blogging Feelings

image

I wasn’t gonna do a personal blog tonight as I’m not feeling well.. I have been in pain all day.. and I still had to watch the grand babies.. so I didn’t take any pain medicine.. well that’s not the reason the reason is I have none.. but that’s another blog for another day..

I wanted to talk about blogging.. and how my email is over run now by bloggers.. and I don’t mine .. well maybe a little..  my policy was to check my email, read post and do one of two things like and comment or just like it.. but I find myself reading post for bloggers who aren’t reading mine.. so the system I came up with is to go on my likes and comments.. and read those post and reply to them first.. out of 81 followers I have on a given day 7 true followers.. so I’m need to figure out how to have faithful followers like me..

Another thing I do is to follow back.. but I am finding everybody doesn’t do that either.. but I follow what interests me.. right now I feel I’m in a place of darkness with this depression and excuse my language this damn pain that I can’t get one freaking doctor to give a damn about me and my suffering.. so maybe that’s one reason I get followers but not readers.. or maybe the just wanting to grow their followers.. I don’t know..

Well at any rate.. I want to say I appreciate everyone who follows me.. but read, like, leave a comment.. sometimes I think this is a competition.. but not with me.. I have to much to release to compete.. 

If you have any thoughts I would like to hear them.. so feel free to drop by and sip some tea, coffee or pepsi..  whatever your beverage of choice is..

 

original me..

Same Old, Same Old

imageI was devastated to say the least when I heard Trump won President of the United State of America.. I really don’t know how I feel because it’s like my insides are numb.. I can only pray that God will protect us His children..

Moving on these last two days have sucked.. I had a doctor appointment Tuesday.. I am so tired of trying to convince doctors that I’m hurting.. it like every doctor say the same thing it’s not surgical.. well that doesn’t make the pain ago away.. it’s still here getting worse.. all I want is some relief at night so I can sleep.. Oh did I tell you my sleeping pill works when it wants too.. sometimes it makes a fool of me night after night.. no sleep makes an already depressed Angy.. worse..

I don’t know what to do I don’t have money for therapy anymore.. but I am still seeing the one who handles my medication.. I know I need someone to talk too.. that’s why is important I blog as often as I can.. if I have learned nothing else .. I have learned that you have to be your own advocate.. and you have to keep going until you find someone with the right answer.. no matter what they tell you don’t give up on You.. I’m one of the bless ones my son helps me all he can.. or I would be homeless.. but I think about the ones who have nobody.. to help them, who have lost everything.. even there hope for a better tomorrow.. I want to tell you I know how you feel.. but Jesus said he would never leave us or forsake us ( Hebrews 13:5).. even when we feel like we are all alone He is with us..

I have no new words to say about the doctors except.. I am disappointed in them.. I only pray that my depression medicine hasn’t stopped working.. because I feel that it has fail me to.. maybe I just need a good night sleep.