The Dumpster

imageI use to always wanna go dumpster diving.. but I could never get my kids to do it with me.. I heard of all the good stuff you find in dumpster.. in rich neighborhoods and college students.. but for the last three years..

I feel like I have been dumpster diving.. I am at the bottom of the dumpster.. and instead of diving .. I am drowning in my own garbage.. I had allowed fear and doubt to be thrown in my dumpster.. I look around and I see depression at the very top.. along with pain and anxiety.. I turned around and I see despair and hopelessness.. I turned to the other side and I see loneliness and unrest.. I look down at my feet and I see something shiny..

I really see can’t it..  so I get down on my knees and I see prayer.. and I can reach it..

So I began to move stuff around.. and I see mercy and grace as they embrace me..to the side I see salvation in His hand and I grab it.. and I continue to move stuff there is forgivenesses and I jump as it wraps itself around me.. I bump up against peace that transcends all understand.. and the more I’m moving stuff around the closer.. I get to the top..

I thought I was moving stuff around.. but stuff was moving in me.. everything I needed to overcome..  all the trash that had been dumped into my dumpster.. the closer I looked the more I could see Jesus.. was still here with me at my lowest.. right in the dumpster with me..

What’s in your dumpster? Don’t give up just start moving stuff around..

The Land of the Free

imageThe United States this place I call home..  The land of the free and the home of the brave.. I was taught about a history.. I was not apart of.. I never knew where I came from.. all I heard was how the white Man discovered this.. and done such great things.. It would be years later that I would discover that the land of the free was built on the back of my ancestors.. I would learn that it was not discovered by Christopher Columbus but yet taken by him from the Indians..

The land of the free and the home of the brave.. was never meant for me to sang.. because I was never meant to be free.. I was meant to be a slave.. to work your fields.. stand on the auction block.. shown off like cattle with my private parts for the world to see.. my name was stolen and so was my body .. they even took my language and I was given a new one..

I was forbidden to love .. and truly be as man and wife.. because anytime Master desired me, my wife or child I could do nothing.. can you imagine me when the Master began to look upon my child with lustful eyes and there was no place for them to hide.. can you imagine my cry as I heard my scream for help.. and in agony I could do nothing but watch..  I had to surrender as a animals to Him.. we were not considered as humans with feelings like the white man.. we were consider less than..

We were not allowed to read and write because with knowledge came power.. and with power came fear of the slave.. of the black man.. with knowledge they could no longer us separated from each other.. we would become one in voice and strength..

So no this will never be the land of the free and the home of the brave.. it will always be a land built on the back of my ancestors .. and taken away from the brave..

original me