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Craving

 

The craving want stop.. no matter how hard I try.. it’s a constant begging from my body to make the pain go away.. what do I say no you can’t have it, not today.. when the pain is so bad that it wakes me up.. craving something to make it go away..

When will the craving stop.. when will I be whole again.. I don’t know all I know is for now the craving is killing me..

The Original Me Ann

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Morning Devotion

Jesus said to him, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes. Immediately the father cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief.” (Mark 9:23-25)

There are times when even Believers have doubt.. it is then we must cling to the word of Jehovah more and call Him on His word..

Jehovah You said You were my Shepherd. I shall not want (Psalm 23:1). So Father I shall not be in want in health as well as having my daily needs met by You.. 

I am sitting here think “so you can have some quality of life” I don’t know what that means but I’ll pass..

Jesus came so that we would have life more abundantly.. not some quality of life.. I want the fullness of life that Jesus promise me.. and I believe I shall have it on this side.. cause He Jehovah is not a man that He Jehovah should lie.. if Jehovah promised it through His Son Jesus then it must be true.. 

The Original Me Ann..

Morning Devotion

I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry, He lifted me out of the slimy pit of mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place  to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the  Lord and put their trust in Him (Psalm 40:1-3).

Let us carry the word of God in our hearts.. reaching out to people where ever we  go to spread the gospel.. I thought about the look I had on my face at Walmart.. how it was not inviting or welcoming to anyone  even though it was feel with psychical pain.. it mad me think who would wanna follow a Jesus who look like that.. always remember we might be the last Jesus someone sees..

The Original Me Ann..

Unpacking YourVictim Bags

Hey Sista, it’s me let drop some knowledge on you from Lisa Nichols book No Matter What.

When the Understanding Muscle is weak, we become a victim of our perceived injustices. We pack our Gucci bags full of coulda, shoulda, woulda, and why- “Why did this happen?-and unconsciously begin to drag them around with us. They become our permission slips to play it safe, which can really mean to stay stuck.

A crucial step in developing your Understanding Muscle is yo realize that the events in your past can’t be changed. They’ve already happened; you can’t wish them away, cry them away, ignore them away, or even pray them away. The only thing you can change is your understanding of them. Strengthening your Understanding Muscle allows you to begin not only to accept the past but even see that all that you’ve gone through, all that you’ve endured, had to happen exactly the way it did for you to become the person you are today.

 

Original me

You Can’t Supersize People!

“All the people in your life are truly doing the best they can with what they have. People can only love you to the capacity that they are able to love themselves. They can only forgive and embrace you to the capacity that they are able to forgive and embrace themselves. They can only give you what they have the capacity to give. You may think that you deserve more, and you maybe correct. But that means nothing if a person simply doesn’t have the ability to give you.”

Lisa Nichols 

Original me

Thanksgiving

Well today was a good day.. I enjoyed spending it with family.. and the food was delicious.. but I couldn’t over indulge.. I guess because of the ACV .. I drink at least three times a day.. quick note don’t drink it straight.. not a good ideal at all..

The only thing I missing is the shopping.. I can’t do it anymore.. and believe me I loved it.. something about the atmosphere, the game face , adrenaline rush.. I loved the feeling..

So now my greatest joy besides being with family.. is listening to my mother scream for Dallas Cowboy.. like they can hear her.. and the occasional threat of getting put out if I don’t stop cheering for Washington.. I was a Dallas fan when I didn’t know any better.. I really wish I could use emojis.. but anyway I’m riding with Carolina but I got love for Seattle too..

It’s just now 7:00 and I feel like my bed is calling me.. I always wonder why old people went to bed so early.. but I honestly believe their bodies starts to just shut down on them.. I’m not old but I tell you the truth.. I could close my eyes right now..

Kohen wanted to spend the night but I told him grandma is hurting to bad.. that’s the problem with chronic pain.. even the best grandmas have to say no sometimes..

Well tonight as you close your eyes.. remember how blessed you are.. and how today you made it.. even if it was just for a few moments of being outside your comfort zone.. you did it..

original me

Who Will Speak

Who will speak for me..  I have no voice to speak for myself.. I lay awake at night thinking.. why is my belly growling.. I have looked all day .. and found nothing for my brothers and I to eat.. Who will speak for me.. I have no voice to cry out.. To defend myself against these men .. who look upon a child  be it boy or girl.. to satisfy their sick desires so they come to my country.. a pedophile is what they are husbands and fathers, lawyers and doctors..  Who will speak for me .. I have no voice to cry out.. I have the scar to show where I sold my kidney.. for money to feed my family.. they say it’s easy money.. that I have two and I only need one.. Who will speak for me.. I have no voice to cry out.. I’m only thirteen and here I am married and pregnant.. I don’t know how to be a wife .. I’m only a child, no rights as a woman.. I’m still a little girl.. why did this happen to me.. Who will speak for me.. I have no voice to cry out..Africa babies..

 

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Loneliness

 

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me.” Psalm 27:10

Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.” Psalm 25:16

He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3

Casting all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. Matthew 28:20